Ali Dahodwala, the 39-year-old businessman, is a father of two sons. Ali has been a fitness enthusiast for 15 years. And he served as a perfect candidate as a FIT FATHER.
Father is a massive term. For a son, a father is his first friend and more of a role model, informs Ali. He believes that kids always look up to their fathers and follow in their footsteps. Hence, a father needs to be conscious of his actions.
Ali is a friendly and approachable dad, as he likes to put it. I never had quality time with my father. I always felt there was a lack of communication, states the doting father. He ensures that there should be enough communication between a father and the kids so that the kids feel free to approach him in every circumstance.
Like a working mother, a father experiences a guilty feeling of not spending enough time with their kids, states Ali. Being a businessman, he never has fixed working hours and there are times when he needs to travel for work. In such cases, he ensures that he spends enough quality time with his sons devoid of the smartphone devils; even if it is for an hour.
A father is always seen as a perfect figure by his kids. A father needs to be fit physically, mentally and emotionally. Physical and mental fitness is interrelated, but emotions are tricky. Being a father, one needs to be emotionally very strong. First of all, stop feeling guilty about what you do. Believe that whatever you are doing is in the best of their well-being, advises Ali.
The parenting of sons is a lot different than that of daughters. It is like refereeing between two monsters, jokes the father of two sons. Daughters, they say, are subtle and more understanding; whereas sons tend to be rebellious and are to be handled tactfully. Sons ought to be notorious and demanding, sometimes even competitive. Parenting sons requires patience and the quality of a good referee. Ali is a sharing-the-load kinda husband. He is well aware that the only way to instill good virtues in his sons is to do it himself. He ensures that he shares the chores with his wife so that his sons know that it is just not the job of a female to take care of the house. Considerable, isn't he?
Coming to handling the insecurities, Mr Dahodwala is consciously aware that his elder son has got greater insecurity than the younger one. Younger ones tend to grab more attention from family members. They are privileged to get things done their way. On the other hand, the elder one is almost always in a compromising or adjustment situation; and it is always the elder one who needs to back off. I try to calm my elder one saying you look up to me, your brother looks up to you. Whatever you do will get reflected by him, says the smart father. He ensures that the elder one is aware that his parents love him equally as his younger one.
In this era of smartphones and social media, it is very important to guide and handle kids well. Ali believes in giving freedom with discipline. He knows that you cannot continuously nag the kids for not using these; instead, be smart and have parental controls over the devices. Don't hover over their head to keep an eye on their actions. Keep a check on their utility and that can be done by parental controls. Kids surely are vulnerable and can easily get carried away by alluring offers. Timely communication with the kids can always be helpful.
Lastly, he signs off with a beautiful thought, Do not burden your kids with a load of expectations. Leave them free and let them fly. It is now their time to explore.
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